There is a stillness in the air.

I found my deep sense of truth when I settled in a sleepy valley; I walked the ridges, hills, which bring a swift chill on a spring morning as you walk. Spending time here on my own, I held onto so many questions, I’ve needed answers for so many years. Interestingly while I know it would be beneficial to have answers, I didn’t know how hard it would be to reflect on the answers.

There is something about wandering, the trails of a sleepy valley, it brings out the joy, the spirit of God flows in my heart when I walk. There is a stillness that makes me delve into a deeper level of conversation with God. There is nothing between me and God to disturb our conversation, no outside influences. Just me, the fresh air how great the feeling.

Life becomes so much clearer as I walk; constant chatter from white noise disappears. It’s just me being me; no mask is needed as I walk. It just you or me walking, it can be challenging. During good and bad days, when I’m down walking is hard.

A liberating as walking is, there is always work to do. I see a path as I walk, I wonder where it will lead or if I was meant to travel this path. So many things I let go of as I walk. Disappointments, achievements, yet I create my life. Sometimes opportunities I see for a quick moment, God’s vision for me.

Now as each day rolls into one sometimes, I realise it’s the way life has always been. There’s no more to add or anything else to take away, or to place in a box closing the lid and forgetting that part of life happened. As hard as it is to let go of annoying habits, that have haunted me for many years. Today there are still possibilities. Now life is revealed, and everything has a clear intention.

Many things will change for me over the next few months and into the New Year. I have discovered a new world with God. I know I’m not done yet, there is so much more life ahead of me, I’ve had a taste of life and new experiences

Many things are going to change over this year. Last year with all of my traveling represented a opportunity for discovering the world. I know I’m not done yet but I’ve had a great taste of what that experience is like. My world has changed.

(c)bjsscribbles

 

 

 

 

Our thoughts come to pass

My mind is my master
A power that molds
Vision held by the master
A power that molds and makes
And statement makes

Boundless we take
From the master
Shaping what we will
The mind is a power and a master
Shaping our thought patterns

Thousands of joys created
The ills inherited
Brought forth by joys created
Our thoughts come to pass
In secret, our world defined
By a mirror, held within my mind

(c)bjsscribbless

The world is only minutes away

I wrote this last night but did not feel happy with it, I wanted to show how far I have travelled with my healing. I’ve done a few essays lately on my life. But this I wanted to give a deep feeling of the love I have started to share with my earthly soul. I wanted also to give the feeling of time,

————————————————————————————————————————–

rain drops 009

From my earthly being
I’ve been lost, perplexed, and defeated.
I’ve wept many tears,from deep within my soul
Refusing to give in
My memory has eluded me
As I walk out of the darkness

One step at a time

When you walk out of the darkness
You feel as though you are leaving a friend
Protecting your very existence
Yet it will strive with all it’s mite
To destroy you

Something you hang onto
Hidden in the darkness
Now fading in time
It’s time to leave this side
.
Venture out into the light

As the words escape
my hidden mind
Of years gone by
I lift my thoughts towards the light
Writing these words

Wandering the globe
Hidden in darkness
Yet it was light, light of day
Searching for truths
Searching for life
No longer in darkness
As God shone the light of day
Above me

The light that once escaped me

Has shown me, the light of life to be lived
No longer a child
Lost in world without thought
Without hope

I sleep now no longer afraid
That I will wake in darkness
I found a place of peace
Night is approaching
I am not afraid

The light of day will shine again
I know as I write this
The world is only minutes away

When I do wake to recognise the world.

I find a beautiful place
Humbled by its beauty
No longer in the place of darkness
Magnificent sights and tribulations

To close my eyes in peace
And wake in a world of beauty
The sun shines on my roses
There is life, beyond the darkness

(c)bjsscribbles

.

A life can be created

Life is created in
No form or shape
Unquestionably life
Is attached to the rest of the world
Look at life with an open mind
In life we deny, play down, or even despise
We let life defeat us
The twist and turns of life created
May seem painful, evil,
Open your mind to the beauty of life
And find, Joy and Strength
Every moment of life
Is a moment of Joy
For those that have a vision
A life can be created
With an open mind
A beauty formed by nature

With God’s help and belief

There is a power within us all

As we walk in the footsteps of our God

Life can be created

(c)bjsscribbles

Fear no more those staring eyes

Rain sprinkles on the window
Morning rain so refreshing
Yet I feel nothing
Pain and longing
Overwhelm
Staring eyes, fears of wonder
Why am I so tired Lord?

You knew me before I knew you Lord
Life had held onto me for ransom
But you found the key to my mind

Teaching me how to feel
You rocked my feelings
Making me feel whole again

The light of the day peaks through
The gloom of rain sprinkling on the window
Shinning a light lifting my soul from the lost
In a world where, fears of wonder
Claim your pain and longing

Lifting my soul from the lost
You had the key to my mind
Lifting me out of a tiredness
That held me for ransom

You made me feel again
With the shinning light warming my soul
Waking me from a tiredness
No more pain
No more longing
Fear no more those staring eyes

(c)bjsscribbles

Lost

Have you ever been lost?
Thoughts, reflections,
And wholly given over to complex thoughts,
Stand still,

Lost in thoughts,
Reflections, move about
Thoughts move about,
Your complex mind,

Stand still,
Let your thoughts settle,
Reflections will settle,
As your mind settles,

Your imagination will calm you,
Imagine a forest standing before you,
They are not lost, trees, and bushes are never lost,
Stand still, and listen to the sounds in your heart,
Listen with your eyes, listen with your senses,

You are in a place called home,
And yet you treat it as a perfect stranger,
The forest has been your safety,
Your imagination has been your safety,

Listen to the breeze that flows,
Past your senses, see the breeze as the branches swirl,
Sounds of the forests leads you to the heart of all,
You know the safety of this forest, you return,
Time and again with your thoughts and reflections,

Birds return each year, familiar with branches,
As though they had radar, they know their way,
Especially at nesting time,
Stand still listen to the breeze,
Listen to the trees, listen to your senses,
Listen to your heart, the birds, stand still,
If what your forest does, in your mind,
Puzzles you,

Then your mind is in a whirlwind,
You are lost in a world of no-where,
Let your forest know you are there,
Let your heart and mind find who you are,

Have faith, God will help
And you will know who you are.
Amen

(c)bjsscribbles

In the depth of depression

I can write this as I know what it all feels like, and how depression can alter your life patterns.

In the depths of depression
There is a rolling fog that can
Be daunting as it clouds your brain
Lost in a world of utter dismay

From the depths of your heart
Filled with bewilderment, perplexed
Full of difficulty and confusion
Your lost in a world of utter dismay
You weep for your life
A life restored

Your friend becomes a darkness
A protective shield held, around your very existence
Destroying your will to live at times
Eating away at all your emotions

A dream lost in time
Happiness is often dark and desperate
Often fading in time
You become scared of the other side
Of darkness

Often you wonder
How do you escape
The darkness

Often thoughts written on paper
Show dark feelings

To search, to wander the world
Hidden from the light of the world
Admitting you need help

Wondering what is to come of you
Eyes saddened, broken soul

You are a human being
In every shape or form
You maybe lost
Without an once of hope

Your mind races
During the night
Tossing and turning
Sleep evades you
A place of comfort provides
Solitude, peace, quiet

There is a light that will shine
I know this, I’ve been there
It’s difficult, I know

You will survive, You will find the light

Look for a world, it is an amazing place
Form a united front, live life
I know the world can be a place of darkness
Evil, and trials that force us to struggle
Remember, there is a light
It’s difficult I know

(c)bjsscribbles

Faith heals all wounds

A cry of pain summons a violent mind,
Anger, deforming, turbulent, shrivels the brain,
Long ago day dreams once held memories,
But now the mind is eaten up,
In the depths of winter, darkness holds a conspiracy,
As consuming as a mind held prisoner in time,

Darkness prevails over the mountains,
Faces dark, and grey, in the depths of depression held by winter,
Lacking vitality as if fading away,
A echo is heard from above the mountains,
Continues to spread sorrow,

Time has taken it toll on the land
Slowly manipulating, dark depression
Time has become a witness to this land
Roses that once bloomed happily
Now held in darkness
Watch in vain

Do not cry in pain
Do not judge
Absorb the pleasures of your soul
Pray your healing prayer
Pray constantly your deep wounds will heal
Do not rely on time to heal all wounds
Faith grows stronger with prayer
Faith heals all wounds.

(c)bjsscribbles

10000 Emotions

I wrote this when I came away from my counseling this week and after my session this week I could not believe how light I felt.

___________________________________________________________________________
10000 emotions filed away in my heart,
For mine I tell you my heart is full of tears as I weep for you,
The darkness of night befalls me, my heart is so full of mixed emotions,
My mind is racing with words, mixed words, as I face this, silent night,
10000 emotions sit at the pit of my stomach waiting, weeping,

Mixed within my mind, a faith, waiting to be explored,
Woven, deep within my mind, giving me strength,
Deep whispers, echo this silent night, guiding me into the depths,
Of darkness that waited for me, for years I wanted to scream,
I wanted to understand, as I sunk deeper into the night,

Venomous words lingered in my brain for so long, like a nervous road map,
Hidden, for many years, waiting to be summoned, echoes of the past,
Nights, spellbound by the darkest nights, nights without form or wonder,
Weeping into my heart and mind were sorrow and pain, an apocalypse,
I could not explain, the mystic of my mind, confused, until I could forgive myself

10000 emotions filed away, years of sorrow and pain, filed away,
Images till now, words, reflections, sorrow and pain, solitude,
I had faith, all but perfect, yet to be explored, feelings,
I sought reality, I sought life, Oh! the wonders of life,
There is a way towards the light of life,
The minds conscience weaves a tale,

A ghostly shadow of the mind and heart, that appears at night,
Embrace them, the lost can be found, if let walk towards the light.
Have Faith Praise God….Amen

(c)bjsscribbles