Deep inside our minds

Lately I have been doing some deeper work with my psychologist opening deep secrets that I carried with me right through my life. Finally dealing with life, I am moving on further. Each line I have written has meaning for me. Dealing with the past with imagery is a powerful tool.
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Where is meaning in this world
I have struggled to find meaning
We all know this world, yet we struggle
Today we try, but yet we wonder

I wonder where it is all going to end
Where should we all go?
There is so much hidden
Questions unanswered
Will we ever find the answers
The answers hidden, among the maze of the world
Deep inside our minds
Hidden deep in our inner soul

Life that is hidden, life we try to hide
Life does find you,
And it all releases
All the secrets of life hidden beneath the shield
The secrets of life can ruin the life you have made
Free up your life and release the secrets, dark secrets
The memories will fade, hidden in our lives
So many stories untold, of things we didn’t want told
The world came to a close for me, I told someone
Finally closure, my feelings are known
The struggle will soon be over
I am finally home

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The inner soul

Lately I have struggled with my thoughts, there has been a great deal going on in my life. Turning to God has saved me more and more each day. Keeping me moving forward, I have been moving forward but I have struggled to write. The more I think I am getting there, I seem to take a step back.

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Music of life, created day and night
My nature is that of music
My lips have stammered
My sound has struggled
I utter a silent sound
Not able to fulfill the need of others
Dreams, thought, feelings interlaced
Inwardly, all senses answer the call
Tunes, so mysterious to the ear
Which step out to greet, granting infinite pleasure
From the darkness of the night, to the light of day
The soul I struggle to bear, the song of  my soul,
My inner soul has struggled
Through the portals of hearing, the beauty
Now of night, utter all sounds
Thunder now of night, breaks its own cloud
My flesh shivers, before my soul

(C) bjsscribbles

There was a time

 

So many life changes have come into my life. Sometimes I have to pinch myself to believe it is me living this life. I am feeling pretty good and pleased.

Sometimes old doubts creep into my mind, I have to shake myself and tell the dangerous doubting thoughts to get out. Those times are hard and tough going, but with the help of many around me and most of all knowing God is in my life. I get through.

There have been times lately when I have wondered if I’ll ever be free of the life I led before. With so many things happen it’s hard to keep the past where it should be, in the past. The scars are slowly passing, fading, they will fade further over time. I have had trouble believing in myself, today I’ve come to the point where I do.

The person that cause so much heart ache over time in my life is slowly fading as well, but unfortunately, news creeps through. Refreshing the memories, now I move past those time quickly, but I feel for those in the city that deals with it most of the time.

I love the quiet in my life now, no arguments, no yelling, no hiding. Finally I feel as though there is peace in my life. At the moment I am looking after friends dogs for about a fortnight, I was anxious a bit, thoughts of my dogs came flashing before my eyes, which is only natural after all I had them for the best part of 20yrs. Today as my friends left for Sydney, I have felt comfortable with the dogs, really I don’t know what I was worried about. Almost as though I have never been away from dogs.

To express the feeling of how I attained peace in my life is puzzling to me. Many say it is simple because I have “God” in my life but I often wonder is it as simple as that. Maybe it is. My trouble is I have been looking for so many answers, but it has been before my eyes all the time.

I truly don’t know how I got through all the years of turmoil in my life before without “God”, many times I coould’ve taken my life but continued pushing through, to get where I am now. There are many I know that don’t have g”God” or any sort of belief in their life. I became tired of the answer one foot after another, I knew there had to be a better way, I guess I found it.
(c)bjsscribbles

 

There was a time,

When I didn’t have all the answers

Who’s to say that I do now

Who’s to say anyone does

I remember many saying

“What goes around comes around”

I believe, now

The many tears that have passed in time

Tears pass away, then you finally see

Life is alright, whatever you do

Memories, come back to you

You remember it is all true

Life is alright, whatever you do

It’s coming back, to you

The passion of life caught between

The beauty of a rose and the remains of life covered in ashes

At the end of your rope

You don’t want to feel, you don’t want to be seen this way

There is hope, your hanging on to hope

The nights will turn around

You’ll be found, and someday you will rise again

Life is alright, whatever you do

Memories, may come back to you

You remember it is all true

Life is alright, whatever you do

It’s coming back, to you

There is hope, your hanging on to hope

The nights will turn around

With God in your life.

 

(c)bjsscribbles

The beauty of God’s world, amazes me

The beauty of God’s world amazes me, each morning. At the moment without God in my life, I don’t know how I would get through each day. After my Doctors appointment, I have been doing some thinking and wrote this.

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I walk each morning enjoying the early morning sunrise,
I tilt my head across the hills, focusing my eyes on the soft powdery sky
A soft gentle breeze crosses my body, I feel a presence
My eyes search, the horizon, there is a quietness about
The early morning brings a special time for me
God’s peace is with me, each morning
Trees, and vines, growing rapidly
Birds, guide my pathway, from tree to tree

Among the hills
The beauty of God’s world, amazes me
Each day I feel God as I walk and continually pray
The sun rises over the hills, images rise among the clouds
Dear Heavenly Father, I cry out to you for help, keep me safe,
Show me the way of life, give me hope, there is always hope
As my Faith grows, along with Trust, I feel Your love, God
Your love has given me the strength to face my fears
A gentle breeze flows across my body, sending shivers down my spine
God is with me, I know He is there
With God in my life, I know I am never alone
God, I know You were with me, right from my birth
I’ve opened my heart to You, You are inside my heart
Guiding me, trust is now abiding in my heart
My prayers to You have enabled me to master my life
God never leaves us, I know that now
A soft breath of air crosses my face
God has heard me this morning
Life has gathered me to a life I never knew, now many surprises each day
Strength, trust, faith in God, outweighs, sorrows, or regrets.
There is a tomorrow, the sun will shine, my walks guided by God
Continue each day, with birds singing God’s tune
Memories come and go, I remind myself, memories also fade
But now I live to enjoy life anew each day, and all it may bring.

(c)bjsscribbles

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Phil 4:13

 

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9

 

Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you. Deut. 31:6

 

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Eph. 6:10

 

The LORD is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him. Psalm 28:7

 

I will go in the strength of the Lord GOD; I will make mention of Your righteousness, of Yours only. Psalm 71:16

Your Spirit, is in us all

The many twist and turns in life, we can know that God is there willing to help us all. I’ve been checking some of my prayers in my journal today. To hot in Australia to venture outside today.

 

I speak of Your greatness Lord,
I talk of You and Your Goodness
Words You share

Though I have only known You a short time,
I see the many wonderful things You do
I’ve spread Your word to many

Know that I now know, You Lord, please don’t leave me
For the ones that follow, should know Your greatness as I do
Your power, that shapes a world

Dear Lord, I feel Your power each day
The wind You create reaches far above the skies
Your Spirit, is in us all
There is no – one like You

I’ve seen troubles and hard times
I had to see them, You were with me
But I did not know it then
You have picked me up, given me a new life
Together, I can do more
Your comfort shelters me
Praising You each day
In Jesus name Amen

Emotions by the waters edge

From deep within our mind, thoughts
There was always water
As children, playing happily
Along the water’s edge
Around the boats, we wandered
Jumping ropes coiled, laying quietly on jetties
Day by day, consciousness of the water
About our lives, by rivers, lakes, or oceans
The crashing waves hitting the fore shore

As we grew, so did our awareness
Our knowledge of water ways
Rivers swell, Oceans abound
We grew to know the expressions of water
Water our friend or foe
We turn our knowledge to our advantage
What days to wander by the ocean
What days to meander the rivers
Yet there is times to stay at home

The thirst for the ocean fore shore
The friendship we create, with the ocean
The sense of the way life is, or is not
A change in weather, creates havoc
Perception of the weather
Creates a new direction
New life under the sun
A cycle of life

Through the storms of life
Shock and realisation
There is a time we are called
One by one, a shadow appears
I feel a presence, a power, the power of God
Beyond the terror of life
We are expected to flounder
From that shadow, we feel a tug
Lifting us out of the depths

The echo, the howl of the wind
Our ambitions sometimes chaotic
Each ambition, sometimes we miss, and miss again
Through moments of grief
The last days of spring rain
Walking in between the coming rains
The lands blossoming, drinking up waters
Our minds wander of life to come

As we turn to the water
Hear the cry of birds
The evening breeze
The beauty of the constant motion
Again and again waters roll back and forth

The wind rises,we huddle down
Hiding our faces from spray
The early light would find
Us walking freely by the waters edge
The beginnings of dawn
Wind blowing the sea grasses
Voices carry across the windy shore
The fresh morning air on the edge of the wind
Clouds burn high above with the morning sun
Reflecting images on a distant hillside
Our hearts lifted towards the morning sky
Soaring on the coat tails of wind and rain
(c)bjsscribbles

God will hear a cry,

The cry
The soul is troubled
For often the eye mistakes
And the brain is trouble
Again and again
Comfort and help
Comes from the Lord
Yet anguish comes from the memory of our sins
Our iniquities
Are saved by the measures of forgiveness
Like the corner of a gem
Placed delicately, do not pass over them
A psalm will carry you to a place you need
Your soul waits for you
God will forgive, he waits for us
To come to him,
Things beyond all powers
The cry of a child, God will hear
Shadows of the world, will appear
As God reveals the answer
And we draw on God’s grace.

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