I woke up yesterday

I woke up yesterday as I do each morning now, reaching for the kettle to make a cup of coffee. I thought to myself, “I am the best; I’ve been in a long time.”

There was a path to travel, laid out before me many years ago, I didn’t know it then as I do now. Now it is the time to travel the next path, I don’t know where it will lead, but I do know it is there. Experiencing freedom within one’s self is amazing as you walk with God close by. There is no sense of panic now, or any missing pieces, it is just clarity for the first time in my life.

When I left my home in Adelaide a short while ago, there was so many stories built up in my life, a very personal story. Why I was doing so much, and what my life meant to me. Truth is so important and incredibly valuable. A great deal of my life will stay very close to my heart.

However as the years have now gathered around me, I have carried on in my life, so many thing have changed. I’ve experienced many different things, and they have changed me. Settling where I have has slowly changed my heart, appreciating the smaller things, more importantly, settling into truly enjoying my own company, without trying to get to be somewhere else in life’s journey. I am home now.

I have traveled this great land Australia, listened to music, walked the many beaches of Australia. Now I realise there has been many happy moments in my life, with those special to me. Exploring the desert of Australia with my dogs, watching them frolic and play. Life is good

I lived, my life and have experienced much more in life than I ever thought I would, now I am living more than ever before. My experiences have served me well, now I am in contact with life and what is happening, my life has not been full of glamour, I’ve worked through the many rough patches. But most of all my life has given me clarity. My life path is now glowing so much clearer.

I am now walking the path and doing things I need to do. For this first time in my life I know what is right for me. I am committed to myself, making every effort to what is right. I have a chance now to live and I am taking it. When this year started I never expected the events to unfold the way they have, but life has now shaped me and helped me understand who I am. No matter what challenges may come my way, I can do this.

My journey is not over it is just changing, the season of life, I am now prepared for. Thoughts and doubts that surrounded me have gone. It taught me through space and time what truly mattered to me and I wouldn’t change my walk for the entire world.

I fit in now, all there is to do is to follow the path every single day God has set out for me

 

It’s time now for me to evolve, my story of life is engulf in my blog, it’s just a story in prose. The way life now has changed me, or how I see life. It doesn’t me it’s the way it is going to be. Over a short time I have changed, my words have changed me. I was tired depressed, oppressed, full of anxiety, I did not want to be that person anymore.

I was on a path to destruction, too frightened to speak, I could barely put too words together. I knew if I didn’t change, I would never change. I would not be alive now.

 

My blog has been a process of change, I have healed through the power of God, I have grieved for what I lost, I have moved on. Day by day, through my actions, through my changes, I am now living in the future. I don’t know where it is going to lead me, only God knows that, I don’t really wish to know.

Have you ever chosen something and wondered why? It is exactly what I have done in my life, God knew I would turn to him. I achieved life.

We can changed our lives and live, no-matter which way we go about it all. Life will not be perfect, but the future depends on today. The seeds of life were planted for me by a now good friend, helping me now to love and enjoy life today.

You can find your life. I did.

 

(c)bjscribbles

The inner soul

Lately I have struggled with my thoughts, there has been a great deal going on in my life. Turning to God has saved me more and more each day. Keeping me moving forward, I have been moving forward but I have struggled to write. The more I think I am getting there, I seem to take a step back.

———————————————————————

 

Music of life, created day and night
My nature is that of music
My lips have stammered
My sound has struggled
I utter a silent sound
Not able to fulfill the need of others
Dreams, thought, feelings interlaced
Inwardly, all senses answer the call
Tunes, so mysterious to the ear
Which step out to greet, granting infinite pleasure
From the darkness of the night, to the light of day
The soul I struggle to bear, the song of  my soul,
My inner soul has struggled
Through the portals of hearing, the beauty
Now of night, utter all sounds
Thunder now of night, breaks its own cloud
My flesh shivers, before my soul

(C) bjsscribbles

Songs of our lives

Songs of our life are the tunes of God
God writes the words, the patterns
We set the tune, to music each day
Songs of sadness, sweetness, or glad
We choose the time, fashion, each situation

We write the tune, whatever song of life
Rhyme or reason, sadness, we can turn into joy
We can turn Joy into Joyfulness

Each life has a song, that is free and strong
Music he writes is only a small part
Sadness, the pain in life
The singer becomes the story teller

The singer talks to God, in his voice
A hymn resinate’s across the sky
He knows not how the words sound
Words lonely and sad, because
The tune is dreary

Music ringing across the sky
Under the tune of sadness
The song of another
Through words, turns pain into gladness

Triumphant words, now ring out
Giving the world, more joy
Setting ourselves alive, in the world of God
So whether our songs are sad or not
In which the heart is now set alive
We can live and survive

(c)bjsscribbles

Feel the warmth of God

Walk in the sunlight, talk to the sunlight
Soft as the day goes by sunshine, mover of a day
Feel the warmth of God

A tune calls out, but I never saw a face
Times are heard but not replaced
I venture to talk to the sun, not loosing my place
Cast out in the sun by the light of day
Lost in the lights ray
I search for the sounds, as echoes play in the sun

What happens to the tunes we once knew so well
Caught within the world of sun rays, created by God
I’ve waited all my life to feel the tunes of freedom
Moment by moment, tunes echoed in the sun

The future unknown, splendour has begun in the sun
The light and the sun meld as one, by God
There is a moment in time when my world reaches the skies
Magic turns my eyes to the skies

What happened to a world we once knew
Have we forgotten what we once knew
Time we have waited all our lives
Moment by moment

Sun showers come and go season by season
Flowers bloom each season with reason
I feel the warmth of God, today

(c)bjsscribbles

With God’s world

Thoughts, carry on the breath of wings
I hold my thoughts close
Skillfulness deep within
We send our thoughts forth
To fill the world

Our innermost thoughts
Messages the remotest spot
Leaving a message of blessing
Or messages of woes
Leaving footsteps behind as it flows

I remember, its all in Gods timing
My body is still, as I sit thinking my thoughts
All the thoughts I have not known
Or dare to share, and yet thoughts when alone

Today my thoughts have life
They fly, on the wind, with the breath of God
Impressing me, as the leave
A breath flows into my home
Following me, with messages

At the time when we forget
There are times when we outgrow our thoughts
A thought that vanishes, sometimes
Will make it back to your mind
Finding it home as a companion
Nesting in your mind

Share your secret thoughts
A vital part of life
Shaping your world
Molding life
Within Gods world

(c)bjsscribbles

Thank you Lord for the help You have given me

 

Life experiences sometimes are a challenging for us all to achieve the mountain heights and leave anxiety and depression behind. Once this next section of my life is complete, the work I am doing at the moment with God’s help, I should not be walking in the valley of darkness any more. God has taught me many things along my journey so far, proving I am never alone, though I have felt the depths of loneliness when I have been ill. I believe there were so many feeling pent up inside me, He wanted me to face the truth, learning there are many parts to the power of God’s will, I may not have ever come to know otherwise

My  depression is over, all I can do is stay positive, my friend anxiety creeps in as it did earlier this year with quite a bang, it was totally out of left field, I was reeling so hard, my PTSD reared its ugly head. When fear controls your memories and flashbacks, reaches into my soul again after so long being away, you don’t sleep, toss and turn. I wanted it all to go away; it has left my body for now.

There are many of us out there that struggle; I know I am one of millions. Yet when I turned to God out of desperation, repented, and turned to God for the first time in my life. Learning I am on a journey now in my life with God following alongside. We all know the poem “Footsteps in the sand”. We are reminded we are not alone, learning to trust again for the first time in my life has bought me closer to God and I know He loves me and you that are there alongside me. There are times still when I don’t know what is happening to me, lately I have had a major COPD attack, struggling to get on top, many times in  and out of desperation I have prayed. “Lord, Help me I need my breath” In Jesus name Amen

My prayers are slowly getting better over time, learning how to pray, by just talking to God has been the most challenging experience. People have told me my prayer are from the heart. Also someone told me it is just like talking to a friend, because of my life before I never knew much about friends. Today, I either turn to Isaiah, Psalms, there is a special nearness here that I achieve when I need that special closeness. When I am walking around the hills, I feel God’s breath, the Holy Spirit, walking with me. God has become my strength, the envelope of my Faith. When I read this section of Isaiah, I feel I am with God and it gives me strength

Isaiah

53

Who has believed our message

and to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed?

2 He grew up before him like a tender shoot,

and like a root out of dry ground.

He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him,

nothing in his appearance that we should desire him.

3 He was despised and rejected by mankind,

a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.

Like one from whom people hide their faces

he was despised, and we held him in low esteem.

4 Surely he took up our pain

and bore our suffering,

yet we considered him punished by God,

stricken by him, and afflicted.

5 But he was pierced for our transgressions,

he was crushed for our iniquities;

the punishment that brought us peace was on him,

and by his wounds we are healed.

6 We all, like sheep, have gone astray,

each of us has turned to our own way;

and the Lord has laid on him

the iniquity of us all.

7 He was oppressed and afflicted,

yet he did not open his mouth;

he was led like a lamb to the slaughter,

and as a sheep before its shearers is silent,

so he did not open his mouth.

8 By oppression[a] and judgment he was taken away.

Yet who of his generation protested?

For he was cut off from the land of the living;

for the transgression of my people he was punished.[b]

9 He was assigned a grave with the wicked,

and with the rich in his death,

though he had done no violence,

nor was any deceit in his mouth.

10 Yet it was the Lord’s will to crush him and cause him to suffer,

and though the Lord makes[c] his life an offering for sin,

he will see his offspring and prolong his days,

and the will of the Lord will prosper in his hand.

11 After he has suffered,

he will see the light of life[d] and be satisfied[e];

by his knowledge[f] my righteous servant will justify many,

and he will bear their iniquities.

12 Therefore I will give him a portion among the great,[g]

and he will divide the spoils with the strong,[h]

because he poured out his life unto death,

and was numbered with the transgressors.

For he bore the sin of many,

and made intercession for the transgressors.

In Jesus name Amen.

I struggled a great deal in my life, with doing the right thing all the time. Sometimes I wished it was not bred in my DNA. It would lead to confusion, Anxiety, I would wonder what people thought of me and say about me, if I did the opposite. I could not live like that anymore I had to put myself first in my life, but alongside God. The Lord has become my salvation and when I stumble, it may take days or weeks but I pick myself up.

A friend once showed me these verses which taught me a great deal.

Isaiah 43: 5-7

Do not be afraid, for I am with you;

I will bring your children from the east

and gather you from the west.

6 I will say to the north, ‘Give them up!’

and to the south, ‘Do not hold them back.’

Bring my sons from afar

and my daughters from the ends of the earth—

7 everyone who is called by my name,

whom I created for my glory,

whom I formed and made.”

In Jesus name Amen

I feel so encouraged when I see and hear God’s scripture, I feel as though God hears my prayers, lifting my worries from my shoulders. Sometime I am so overwhelmed by what goes on about me it is easy to fall away from God’s world, but I know better now. The only way now is with God.

!st Thess 5:16-18

16 Rejoice always, 17 pray continually, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

This is another of the scripture I first learned, and it has become an important part of my life now. I have found it possible to pray continually and rejoice in God’s word, especially when things are not going well. Many times I wished I knew God before in my life, I did not know how to reach out, now I do. Jeremiah 33:3 “Call to me and I will answer you, I will show you the thing you do not know.” Mathew 7:7 “Ask and you shall receive, seek and you will find…….A dear friend taught me that scripture.

There are many other scriptures that I have come to know, please add your favourite if you feel led to in the comments.

There are many truths in the Bible, the most important thing to know is the peace you feel when you are with God in prayer. When you are anxious take it to God, praise God for helping and give thanks. Sometime I feel a peace about me I don’t understand, like Friday when I came home from an appointment, I felt sure I would have been pacing the floor with anxiety, but I wasn’t, I was at peace with what I was doing. I know God has been with me. As I walk through the last of the demons in my life and deal with them finally.

Search your heart when you spend time with God, but first make sure your heart is empty. You maybe are restricting yourself from being near to God if you don’t. Seek and You will find him.

In Jesus name Amen

 

There is one who came for us

Call the Holy Spirit
“Come to my soul, Holy Spirit”
Fill my soul, with your presence
I feel an awe when I know You are near
Always as I breathe, Your Spirit
Your desire
To teach us all,
Your pleasure to show
The gentle flow of Your Spirit
Teaches us to grow
To those who believe
A comforter has come
The Holy Spirit
I am one
Who thought
There is other ways
Now I ask the God the Father
As I lay my troubles at the cross
Jesus shows me the way
With, Faith, Truth, Strength, Courage
There is no other God
There are powers, beyond the realm
Mighty powers we fight
Jesus rose on the third day
Fight of the power of the devil
Dear, Heavenly Father, I feel your Spirit
In the breath I breathe,
I worship You each day
My quiet time I dwell on You
While I wait for You to come
In Jesus name Amen
Galatians 5:22-23
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,