Where do I begin

I’ve search my screen for answers, now the decision, is where do I begin writing my story?
I’ve come to the position where my is closing one door an another is opening, so many things happened in my life. There is a huge gap in my life now as I wonder where I’m going to finish. I try looking around a corner for answers. I cannot let go of my old life altogether as there is two grown up daughters. I know the past is my life that was, but my new life is now created, I can involve my daughters. There will still be hurt, my healing will enable me to deal with the hurt. As time goes on the consequences will become clearer.
There are thoughts of challenges ahead, how do you let go of something that helped you survive? I am now the person I am today because of the life I led. I was able to get through the worst times of my life, because of the person I was. I had strength, even though I was wearing out. I felt there was someone looking out for me but did not know whom till now.
Writing this is going to be a challenge, I’ve struggled to get where I am. There is a desire for the healing of my mind body and spirit. The old story of my life rises from time to time manipulating my request to close the book on my old life over and over. Countless times my past rises and sabotages the path I have been following.
There is an outstretched hand reaching out to me, guiding me toward the light, footsteps invisible to the naked eye. Pulling me through the forest of life, I just have to never let go now, never turning back
I have started this process many times, never being able to complete the process. It has taken time, after all it was a lifetime I left behind. Maybe it is a lesson I have to learn, faith truth, trust, strength, courage. I struggled, a great deal over the past handful of years, it’s still all new. As a young person I lost my faith in God, but I have found my faith in God. When I was going through the thick of my healing, I felt so lost in all forms of life. I could not barely put two words together without stammering.
All of this time has led me up to this point. The next chapter, of my life, starting new pages that need to be written as I move forward. The changes that started a few short years ago, when the attempts at making a new life began. Now the new story begins, I have no idea what is going to happen, I know it’s beginning with an adventure and love of life. When I come home after January I wont stop writing or talking.
I know now, I just have to let go, the lessons of life will continue to flow. By letting go I can become more.
As I now close the old book of my life, It pushed me to live as I do now. It helped me become more than I could have ever thought I could be. I see all the moments that I have lived, I feel all the times I have failed and got back up, dusted myself off and started again. I have been resilient, in moving throughout my new life step by step.
I must use what I have learned, my willingness to heal, my faith is now relentless to believe.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.—Philippians4:6-7

January is going to be full, with a trip to the tennis, Australian open championships, for me all my dreams will come true. Turning 65 on centre court. I’ve come from nothing, I’ve grown as a person, full of courage, new found faith, and trust.
The unknowns and challenges leave me feeling anxious. I’ve achieved a great deal over the past few years. A new challenge is facing me as I said going to the Australian Open tennis, flying in a plane. Don’t laugh it is 46 yrs since I was on a plane. Planes now have engines not propellers. Making my way around Melbourne. I’ve been working on a to do list while I am there. I am remembering Paul’s words, “Don’t worry pray”
The word’s of Paul encourage us all. One thing I have come to realise “Life is not without uncertainties” as I read Paul’s words. What I continue to learn is God cares about our lives. All of us face major life transitions, family issues, health scares or most of all financial troubles. God has shown me, I can let go of my fears of the unknown, and stop worrying about what may or may not happen.
As I open the door to my next stage of life, I can rest in God’s promises, that his peace and understanding will guard my life as He does others. Guarding our heart and mind.
It is a blessing not to be anxious about anything, God reminds us we can come to Him about anything and everything. I praise God every morning for what He has done in my life and what He has done in many of my friends lives.
Knowing now God is in my life eases my mind, with prayer, we lift our anxiety
up to God and find comfort and peace in God’s hands. Replacing our anxiety with God’s trust.






Today I found the Kidman trail, driving on the back roads of the Barossa, I had to share this delightful old building I found. Even though it is falling apart I wondered if Sir Sidney Kidman may have stopped there.  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sidney_Kidman.

Australians who know the history, know Sidney Kidman was one of the largest pastrol land lease across our great country.

The wall, the roof
Stood the test of time
I was always very high
Chipping away at the test of time
Stone by stone
Today it’s rough around the edges
Bricks falling by the way
Quite shabby, it was a home once
It’s falling bit by bit
Clouds pass by, roof leaks
Walls could tell stories
People, working, walking,
It all tells a story,
Some even argued
Bricks made of mud
More than you will ever know





My soul comes Alive, Australia



There’s a place in my heart
For a land I carry with me
I carry a pride for my land

My soul comes alive
There is a special strength
The land taught me to fight
To become who I am today

There is a magic and mystery
That comes from a sunburnt country
Forever this land will be my home
My heart is free, where the sunsets
In the bush, where the suns glisten
Across the skies of Australia

The dust gets in your skin
The creeks, flow into rivers
This land Australia is in your blood

Blue gum’s, cockatoos, koalas, kangaroos
Uluru, cities, sun and surf
Red sunsets across the outback

Were proud to be Australian
We love our land
Sleeping under the skies
Watching shootings stars
The night are yours
Under the stars of Australia









Australian Pelican



Pelican at the waters edge
Figures, shinning of the edge
Sleek and glowing in the silver wind
Blown across the land
That no-one can understand

In the clear shadows of dusk
Thin pools of water flicker

Under the stars, glistening by night
Only a flicker, I see the Pelican
Swiftly others flicker and land

Outward, beyond the eye of the Pelican
Seeking solitude
Where the winds brood
Across the waters

At one with with the wind and water
Quiet and understanding
Still when the spill of a wave
Scurries the Pelican and brood

Dusk, by the sea, linger a while
Tide, silver winds, ions, relax
Air, breeze, for the wings of a Pelican
Rise above an ocean, distance only motion
On the wings of God’s creation.


Shy yet glamours Australian bird the Kingfisher



I sit beside the lake listening in the sun
Quietly watching, Kingfishers on branches
A little noise and a flap of the wings
Lift off and further chatter, they dive into the lake
What danger for the fish huddling in spools beneath the water
Bush garden nearby, they feel the wind, They’re flying to rest
They were born to fly and fish, that is their life
Wind and water is their home, near the bush
They fly over the lake, nestling where I watch
Others stand nearby watching in awe
Of the majestic Australian bird

Kingfishers follow the water, Birds of
Australia created by God, Follow their
food chain. Glisten across they sky
With a magical chatter
They fly, they fly

They feed by the water
Dropping deep into the water
Flashing through the sky
Amazing creations by God

I wonder how they know,

Where feed is?


A wild free Australia

As dusk falls across the plain
A wild Brumby gallops
A deep dusty orange sun glistens
A race across the windy plain
It’s a song of the heart
Glistening light in the dark
All men are out to catch you
My warm feeling for you
Hopes they never catch you
Let freedom ring across the dusty sky
And rekindle the spark of life
Its a reason to live
When love is alive
Opening the sky’s and letting freedom in
Life is tender and tough

Dingo’s sit gathered together
A lone ridge in the distance
Golden colours of the sky
Fleeing as you spy them
All things wild and tameless
Its the love of the land
Golden sands of Australian
Tame the heart
It’s what love is about
Letting freedom ring
Something in my wild untamed heart
Feels for wild untamed Australia
Dingo’s wild as the Australian bushranger
Brumby’s out live their ban
May you still out match your foe



Please check out the links for a little Australian history.

Born of the ocean

Imagery created of the life by the oceans.


Born of the ocean, salt, wind, sands
Rising out of billows of ocean waves
Born of the ocean breeze, she stood
Blowing kisses across oceans wide
The ocean caresses our soul
Ocean breeze, praises her beauty
Of nature, and beauty, creature of light
Yet the oceans possesses her

Sorrows and anger flood the ocean floor
Has the world forgotten why love was born?
Beauty was born of an ocean breeze
One natural morning

Dwellers by the ocean,
Who feels the wind on her hair and face
Emotions well inside the soul, stirring your heart
The lingering first embrace of  the oceans heart


With each drop of rain

Rain can be friend or foe, In Australia recently there has been floods everywhere. A country known for its long dry seasons, we have had storms that are rarely seen. I wrote this thinking of the good that rain can do. Even though today there is sadness in our country because of floods.

A farmer enchanted by rain
A city dweller annoyed by rain
Yet with all its wild and wooly,
Wind and rain comes worship
Days in the midst of rain, its hard to pray
God is out there, looking down from,
Heaven, is a place, we know its there
But we don’t know where

In the middle of rain there is a pattern,
Into the silence, Our prayer, is heard,
Pledging help, from a sky bound destination

With each bead of rain, falling, lost
Seeks to find. a hollow deep,
Within a crevice, mixing with earthly things
Germinating God’s creatures, giving life,
In remembrance of God ,

With our thoughts focused on God
We praise God, the giver of life
The creator

Of all things
Can you behold nothing greater?
While unto the creator
We praise God the creator of our rain


Ties that bind my heart

I dedicated this to my Dad, and the country where he lived. There is more love now in my heart now than ever before as I have healed my heart further each day. My Dad lived in Country South Australia across the desert country.



My heart, I now watch closely
My eyes, I now keep open
Ties that bind my heart
I walk the line to where life began

My heart is true to those that bind
Yet I am alone at night when each day closes
Yes, as I think about the road to where life began
Because, You are in my life, I follow

The road to where the pepper trees, sway
Relics of life now dust, no signs of life
A rusty line, I follow, in search of life
I keep Your life in my mind day and night

Tracks where those who lived and walked
I follow the line, searching, for life
Where I began, Your at my side
Memories of Your life, now beside me
The Love for is now with me forever
I cannot hide my feelings, as I follow

My heart, I now watch closely
My eyes, I now keep open
Ties that bind my heart
I walk the line to where life began

Wind and rain


The wind and rain keeps coming today here in South Aussie, which led me to thinking about my words this afternoon.



Wind and the rain hold you spellbound
Wild and revealing, days when it is hard to control
Your thoughts, Yet God is with you, up there ,
We pray for rain, We pray for wind, it is with God
We hold our thoughts from Heaven a place we hold
In our thoughts, for one day

The rain and wind
Arrive in prayer, the Spirit within
A binding commitment from its place
Staying seperate from life on earth
Staying within the sky

Each droplet that falls, is lost coming downward
From its kind, searching for hollows, no-matter
How deep, falling, stirring puddles, mixing with
Us earth bound beings

Our thoughts with God, with God the planted seed
Grows within ourselves, the Spirit within
The whole creation

We praise God
For the rains, and the wind
The maker of our rivers
And oceans

The rain and wind will not end
What falls will not rise again
As each droplet falls, finding an empty place
God in his mercy lends his grace
The rain and wind will not end
Wind and the rain hold you spellbound