The value of a friend

This is an important post to me, I have been thinking about words that were offered to me be two special people in my life. My Dad and his brother two very wise men who cherished the core values of life. They taught me a great deal about words friends, I listened, but my life went in other directions. I write this for them, as I did remember what they taught me, one very important phrase I remember from them is “A friend is like a good book, treat your book with care and life will treat you well.”

“Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.”
Mark Twain

As we look up the definition of, Friend: There are people who are aware of how different you are and still enjoy your company. People who make you laugh till you cry. A friend who will share a tear with you is a true friend. When you don’t have enough money to get a ice cream, they chip in. A true friend will offer support and not expect anything in return.  I did not look up the real definition of the word friend; it is how I feel about friends today. I guess I always did feel this way, but till I was prepared to let the walls down and share my life with other people did I realize what a true friend really is.

As I have opened up my life and let people in, I have seen from firsthand experience what a friend can be. Sharing my life with people letting people get to know me has shown me the true feeling of friendship. Not false.

Over the years of my life I’ve struggled to connect with people around me, there has been seasons where I evolved in a community, I felt as though I was living but today I’ve realized I was not. Today now, I’ve learned so much on what it feels like to live in a world where we can thrive.

I feel as though I have been open and honest about my life, I had to be as I was making my way as a single person in a new world. I was so nervous talking to people yet amazingly as I travelled my life story had to come out. People are inquisitive and want to know where you come from or who you are. As I am an introvert this was hard for me but now I say “Hi” and move on and try to move the conversation in a different direction. I can talk about my past now, but I talk about it in a different way, there is no more hurt in my voice. You have to be open and honest if you want to form a true friendship.

“Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.”
Albert Camus

I try to remember the little things, it is important because friendships cannot always be one sided. Life is not always about you, other people you meet have stories as well they need to share. Friendships that have built up over the decades are special; there are reasons why they have lasted. Maybe you celebrated victories shared a special moment over time. A special memory that you remember; over time which stays with you forever a memory only know by you both. It does not take much to pick up the phone and have a chat to a friend. A friendly sms, or a friendly email as it happens in today’s world. Or even a snail mail note can be a special gift from the heart to a friend.

A few milestones are creeping up in my life, special birthdays, and victories in life. Sharing these celebrations has been different as my life has grown in different directions.  Learning to smile and say “Hi” can create a healthy life and celebrate the core of friendships.

Creating a basis for support in a friendship is important, if people need help that is recovering from surgery or other personal needs. Today I try to keep a diary to remind me of things that are going on in my life and around me.

Throughout our daily lives communication and the use of words is a vital part of any relationship, especially ones that last a life time. To me I try to listen carefully and pay attention to conversations. I try to choose words carefully and use words wisely. Before I used to hide my emotions, I kept my life a closed book. Today I express my feelings openly which has given me space for healing and growth. I was so vulnerable to everything surrounding my life; I think as I have progressed along my journey I have made real long lasting connections and friendships that are stronger. I’ve opened up and shared my story with many making a lasting bond.

My aim is to keep learning and keep growing, the friendships I’ve made in the latter half of my life have shown me I can adept to change and different circumstance of life. Sharing my thoughts on life with a friend now means more to me than it ever did before; life is so flexible now constantly evolving. Something new every day happens in the country.

I’ve written and learned a great deal about forgiveness, to forgive freely in a relationship is important. We are human and we all make mistakes, nobody is perfect. To experience a lifelong friendship, there are plenty of opportunities where there can be hurt feelings or mistakes can be made. Life in this world today is so much better living in harmony together. Learning to open up and pressing on in life has been the best thing for me as an introvert. Creating true friendships in a new lifestyle.


Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

9 Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: 10 If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!

John 15:12-15

12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command. 15 I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.

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